Christian Leader: Who is a Worthy Critic?

“When…the commander of the king’s guard, had gone out to put to death the wise men of Babylon, Daniel spoke to him with wisdom and tact.” —Dan. 2:14

There’s no shortage of advice out there today about leadership and facing criticism. I’ve worked on church staffs as an associate pastor and director. I’ve served as an ordained lay elder. I’m currently a chaplain providing spiritual care in hospice and outpatient settings. I don’t offer the following reflections as theoretical, but based in my own story. I’ve never held the title of senior pastor or chief executive but I have been invested as a leader in ministry for longer than a decade.

For years I’ve heard Christian leaders say in effect, “until you’ve led or built something I don’t want to hear your criticism.” Translation: don’t throw rocks from the “cheap seats.” I agree that no one benefits from shots fired by an uninvested consumer or drive-by critic, and sometimes those criticisms show little understanding of the complex challenges leaders face. I don’t minimize the emotional and spiritual impact of harsh judgments offered in bad faith, regardless of who levies them. My intent is not to discount the reality of unjust criticism but to offer a fuller picture and give voice to those often suppressed.

While I can understand the “stand in my shoes” admonition from senior leaders on one level, it’s also never sat well with me. That’s because I’ve personally known ministry leaders who leveraged this principle to discard the veracity of feedback or rebuke from anyone ‘below’ them. Worse still, they take it a step further and assume most of their critics are simply jealous of their “success.” This is not a good look.

I would suggest, then, that if a leader wants to respond to criticism faithfully then he or she must understand the difference between the ‘cheap seats’ and the expensive ones. You may decry the bad-faith detractor, but until you’ve also understood the cost for people with integrity to hold accountable harmful leaders with your status and privilege, I don’t want to hear your qualifications for a worthy critic.

When unhealthy leaders face criticism from subordinates or members, they lose momentum from chasing success. When subordinates face toxic leaders to confront abuse, they usually lose everything. They may never be a lead pastor or start a non-profit, but in a world plagued by partiality, I assure you their words are not cheap. They cost livelihood, community, reputation, and often physical/mental health.

There remain prophets in our midst. As we see so often in the Old Testament, when God sends prophets they speak truth to the powers that be—kings, rulers, religious leaders—and are met with stones, mobs, and death sentences. They may be tried for disloyalty and insubordination, but they speak nonetheless. They may not share your title but they share God’s heart; and reflect it back to you for the sake of truth and justice.

The charge to “save your feedback until you’ve shouldered the load of leadership” can be constructive grounds for dialogue…or a principle driven by pretense and privilege. It deserves serious reflection. Before you (as a leader) take that mantra and run with it, be sure that its logic doesn’t land you in a ‘ditch’ many miles from your integrity. If the main people you listen to for counsel and rebuke are those at the top of an org. chart, chances are you’ve effectively cut off the voice of God in your life.

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As a leader, your first question regarding who ‘qualifies’ as a worthy critic cannot be summarily, “what has he or she accomplished?” If that’s your standard litmus for filtering criticism then you’re in a lot of trouble. Here are some truths and myths (as I see it) about leaders and criticism.

Truth: Embedded in the “stand in my shoes” principle is the reality that the burden of leadership comes with unique challenges and, at times, unique suffering.

Many pastors and leaders do have outrageous expectations placed on them that no man or woman could ever meet. When congregations are conditioned to relate to pastors ‘transactionally’, for example, it doesn’t take much for shepherds to be ousted in hopes for someone “better” on the other side. Leading can be profoundly lonely. I fully acknowledge the reality that senior leaders with integrity suffer unjustly and face undue criticism; I know many of them and their stories are heartbreaking.

Myth: The best people to offer me critical feedback as a leader are those with comparable success, experience, and positional authority.

At best, this view severely limits the scope of necessary feedback you might otherwise receive as a leader. At worst, it espouses pretentious narcissism that de-values anyone who does not share your “status”. On a practical level, last time I checked, church staffs and non-profits aren’t typically comprised of 14 senior pastors or presidents. The people who have the most day-to-day relational context with you are probably people who serve under you. By all means, a leader should enjoy the comradery and friendship of peers in ministry. But you must also acknowledge the limits of a peer’s assessment (of your character in particular) if they’ve never existed in close, daily proximity to you.

Truth: Senior leaders need the shepherding of other senior leaders amidst the losses, gains, and enticements of ministry.

The more voices speaking into your life and ministry who are (or have been) in the trenches, the better, so long as those voices are trustworthy. A chorus of godly men and women sharpening one another toward faithfulness is a gift. But an echo chamber of ‘successful’ leaders promoting one another’s arrogance at the expense of families reeling from abuse? That’s demonic.

Myth: Because you (critic) have not faced my unique burden as a senior leader, you cannot accurately judge my character.

This statement would be true if it pertained to persons with no relational proximity to you, but as previously mentioned, title/age/status does not qualify a critic—character does. There is a strain of Gnosticism in this line of thinking: “because you don’t speak as one of us (senior leaders), you can’t know what’s true about us or our experience; therefore your criticism doesn’t stand.” This sentiment becomes one more way leaders wall themselves off from accountability.

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A worthy critic is one who holds you to a standard of Christlikeness as a leader because they hold the same standard for themselves. They know that the integrity (or lack thereof) of your presence relationally supersedes the list of your achievements or the length of time you’ve held a position. A worthy leader is not hostile to prophetic dissidents, but rather honors their gifts and receives their confrontation. “Let a righteous man strike me—that is a kindness; let him rebuke me—that is oil on my head.” (Ps. 141:5)

The ability to hear God’s correction often corresponds to a willingness to listen and serve at the margins. A Christian leader who does not understand power dynamics or name them out in the open will inevitably produce scapegoats. Not all critics are created equal and not all leaders submit to Jesus. We all need the discernment and humility to speak, listen, or repent based on the Spirit’s invitation. When God speaks to us, will we recognize His voice?

Wilhelm Busch / Pair of peasants with jugs. Verso: Peasant wearing a red jacked